I do. I chase ghosts all of the time. Granted, I'm not rolling around in the Mystery Machine looking for people wearing masks and yes, I'll admit, one of my nicknames in high school was Shaggy. No, not for that reason.
I think we all chase ghosts whether we believe in them or not. These ghosts can sometimes be seen with the naked eye. Sometimes they're near, sometimes far. These ghosts draw us in, pull us on their baring.
If you still haven't figured out this metaphor, I'll just go ahead and come out with it. These ghosts aren't the restless souls of those who have gone on before us, they're the ghosts of a good thing.
We all chase the ghosts of a good thing. These ghosts can take on many forms. They can be fallen dreams, past relationships, material things or social status. Of course this list isn't all inclusive but I think you get the idea.
I'd venture to say that no one is immune to chasing ghosts. I know that I thought I was and was I wrong. I had been doing nothing but chasing ghosts since I left for Topeka to work for CCS. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't have traded that time for anything, and I don't do regret. Still I can't help but think back to the reasons I left Manhattan and the reasons I stayed in Topeka for so long. All of them, just chasing the ghost of a good thing.
Fast-forward to December 2008. Still chasing but something is different. Clarity can be an ugly thing. Mine was hideous. The one thing that I thought I had really set in my life, my work, drove me away from many of the ghosts and put me back in Manhattan. Needless to say, this was a great thing.
Well... at least for the most part.
New town, new ghosts. I'll be honest. I wasn't lead here by a ghost but one of the things that pulled me here quickly became a ghost shortly after. And I'll continue to be honest and say that once that ghost came to be, I chased it for a bit.
Then I had an epiphany, and yes, it was due to a song but I'll cover that at the end. If we keep chasing the ghosts of good things, then the real good things go unnoticed. Another wasted night, another wasted breath. Chasing these ghosts uses us up and once we're used up, we're left stranded.
I'll come clean and tell you exactly what I've been chasing. I've been chasing entrepreneurship. Its no secret that I've been wanting to run my own business for a long time. The more I think about it, the more I think that may be chasing a ghost. I know that I have had several excellent ideas for IT that would more than likely, make that dream come true, however, by the time I'm done with work and working on everyone else's stuff, I'm so burned out that I don't even want to work on my own. So is this a dream or a ghost? I'm not sure, I'll keep asking.
The other is a relationship. Not with anyone in particular. Granted, I have been looking but its not like that. I long to have a deep, completely transparent relationship with someone but it has to go both ways. I know that isn't easy for a lot of people, myself included but every time I get to that point, its gone. I mean, its fleeting. I fear that while I'm chasing the fleeting relationship (the ghost of a good thing) that I may miss the real thing. I have to be careful. Trading a friend for Mary Magdalene does me no good. It doesn't make me a saint, it won't make me a king but I wouldn't have to wait around for the real thing. Yet again, chasing ghosts.
I really think that we should all think about the ghosts we chase and if you're up to it, feel free to post a comment about it. I'll gladly listen.
Title reference: Ghost of a Good Thing
Other references used in this post: Again I Go Unnoticed
If you can get the Mary Magdalene reference, you're awesome.
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